Crocs, the all too ubiquitous footwear among healthcare professionals, weekend gardeners making trip to the local big box hardware store, towheaded young children not paying attention on escalators, and fat Americans on vacation in the Caribbean who are too lazy to walk to the beach so they rent golf carts.

Those who wear Crocs swear by their comfort and convenience. The rest of us in the world think they are hideous and an affront to all that is good in the world of shoe design.

So what would make Nike, a multi-billon dollar global company that routinely collaborates with some of the hottest designers and dominates the urban footwear market decide to make an even uglier version of a Croc?

I don’t know the answer to this question, because surely the amount of revenues netted from this venture can’t be worth the besmirching of the company’s good name.

Recently released, are the Nike Solarsoft Sandals that look like the product of a lust filled night between a pair of Crocs and a pair of Air Max 95s.

I wish that we could dismiss these shoes as knockoffs destined for the flea market and less reputable dollar stores. But, alas, this the second edition of the shoes, the first edition released last summer had a less obnoxious swoosh on the side.

Nike Solarsoft Sandals, coming soon to a strip mall near you in black, green, and blue.