Dear Jessie J,
You are not “sexy and free” in these cutoffs, or should we say cutups. The only thing that is free is your crotch.
You are not a member of TLC nor are you in early 90s Metallica.
The only conclusion we can draw is that you had a stroke in the middle of trying to fashion homemade jortz.
MO’s Verdict: Your stylist hates you more than Katie Holmes is relieved that her bearding duties are finally over.

Caroline Cullen
Caroline Cullen is currently obsessed with Dirty Shirleys, Pauly D's pecks, and Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares on BBC.