Widowcore: How to Dress Like You Buried Him and Got the House

When Prince Albert died in December 1861, Queen Victoria put on black and never really took it off. She wore mourning for the rest of her life, which turned out to be almost 40 more years. Grief was the reason. Brand consistency was the result.

Her empire followed her. Victorian mourning became the most detailed dress code ever invented, with rules about which fabrics, which jewelry and how much shine were allowed at each stage of grief. Widows were expected to stay in mourning for about two years, moving slowly from head-to-toe matte black toward grey and lavender.

We are not suggesting you grieve on a schedule. We are suggesting that a culture that turned sadness into high-necked silhouettes, cascading veils and jewelry made of fossilized wood had some great ideas. Here's how to wear them now.

Stage One: Deep Mourning

The look: Black on black on black, no shine.

The first and strictest stage called for dull black fabric trimmed with crape, a crimped silk with a matte, crinkled surface that absorbed light instead of reflecting it. Nothing was supposed to sparkle, because sparkle meant you were thinking about something other than your loss.

Wear it now: Do head-to-toe black, but keep it interesting with texture. Mix matte wool, crinkled crepe, washed cotton and suede so the outfit has depth. Pick a high neckline, long sleeves and a hem past the knee. Leave out anything shiny: no patent leather, no satin and no metal hardware you can avoid. Done right, it looks less like a costume and more like you're about to inherit something.

Stage Two: The Veil

Victorian widows wore long crape veils over the face, which hid tears from the world and made every widow look like the main character of a Gothic novel.

Wear it now: You don't need a full veil to go grocery shopping. Try a short birdcage veil on a pillbox hat or a slim headband, a sheer black scarf tied over the hair, or a wide-brimmed hat worn low. A black lace mantilla is even better, especially over a slicked-back bun. Save the floor-length version for a night out, where it'll steal the show.

Stage Three: The Jewelry

This is where widowcore gets weird, and great.

Whitby jet was the mourning stone. It's fossilized wood from the coast of Whitby, Yorkshire (yes, the town where Dracula's ship runs aground), and it polishes to a deep black glow that technically isn't shine. After Albert died, demand exploded. Whitby's jet workshops couldn't carve brooches, beads and lockets fast enough.

Then there's hair jewelry. Victorians wove the hair of the dead into brooches, rings, bracelets and watch chains. It sounds creepy until you realize it's just the most literal way to keep someone close.

Wear it now: - Find vintage jet, or black onyx and black glass that look like it, in long beaded strands, chunky brooches pinned at the throat, or drop earrings. - Wear a locket with a photo inside, whoever you want in there. - Cameos, especially black and white ones, pair perfectly with a high collar. - Pin a brooch at the center of a buttoned-up collar for the most Victorian move you can make.

Stage Four: Half Mourning

After a while, widows could add color, but only the colors of a bruise healing: grey, lavender, mauve and purple. This is the fashion version of "I'm doing better, thanks for asking."

Wear it now: Half mourning is the easiest widowcore stage to wear every day. Pair a dove-grey sweater with a plum skirt, lavender lace under a black blazer, or a deep mauve velvet dress with black tights. These colors look moody in a way that's very of the moment, and they don't scream "costume."

The Key Pieces

If you want to build a widowcore wardrobe without buying a funeral, start here:

• A high-neck blouse with lace, ruffles or a pie-crust collar. It works under everything.
• A long black skirt that hits mid-calf or lower. Choose wool for day and velvet for night.
• A fitted black jacket or blazer with a nipped waist. Think riding coat, not office.
• Lace gloves to wear with something completely modern, like denim, to mess with people.
• Lace-up boots with a low heel, preferably a little scuffed.
• A brooch. If you only buy one thing, buy this.

How to Wear It Without Looking Like a Halloween Costume

The trick is to include one modern element in every outfit. Pair the lace collar with jeans. Wear the jet beads with a band tee. Top the long skirt with a cropped leather jacket. Pair the veil with sunglasses. Widowcore is at its best when it looks like you've just come from a funeral and you're about to get a martini.

Wear the black. Keep the locket. And if anyone asks who died, just smile and say, "Wouldn't you like to know."